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Loserr of the Week for January 15th Reported in the Associated Press Evidently never seeing the movie "A Christmas Story", an 8 year old boy in Woodard, Oklahoma took a dare from a friend last Tuesday, in the freezing cold and licked a stop sign pole. It took the paramedics pouring water over his tongue to set him free. For his Effort, this unknown boy has been selected as the Loserr.com Loserr of the Week. Loserr Note: The worst part was his friend didn't even double dog dare him!
Loserr of the Week for Nov 22nd Reported in the Associated Press through the Aiken Standard Ricky N from Aiken, SC was arrested and charged with assault and battery, first degree and armed robberyfor attempted robbery after beating the clerk at a convienence store with a stick during the alleged robbery attempt. Unfortunately his mode of getaway was a riding lawnmower and was quickly caught by the local police. For his well planned out getaway Ricky has been selected as Loserr of the Week. Loserr Note: What really slowed him down was he had to keep emptying the clipping from the bag!
Loserr of the Week for Nov 2nd Reported in the Associated Press through the Wisconsin State Journal Glenn L from Madison, Wisconsin was arrested and sentenced to five days in jail for stealing the wallet and bags of a family visiting the state capitol. Loserr Note: Rumor is they knew Glenn didn't belong in the picture because he was the only person in the photo smiling?
Loserr of the Week for Oct 24th Reported in the Associated Press In Old Saybrook, Connecticut Geraldo F. of Waterbury was doing his job when he realized someone had stolen his car and went on to report it to the police. So why did the police arrest "Tito" as he goes by? It seems, that he was in the process of burlarizing three condos at the time. An officer responding to the burglarlies saw Geraldo fleeing the scene with a pillow case full of items. The car (linked back to "Tito") was eventually found in the condo complex with some of the items that were stolen from the same condos. Geraldo was arraigned on burglary and larceny charges as a result. Loserr Note: Not only was his car stolen but it was reported all the buttons on the radio were changed. Don't you just hate that?
Loserr of the Week for September 21st Reported in the Associated Press through The Daily Herald Don't ever ask a woman her age and never ever ever tell her she has smelly feet. Dallas S. 18 was told that by her boyfriend 19th and now he is recovering from a steak knife stab wound in an EVERETT, Washington hospital. Dallas was challenged to do a backflip and took off her shoes, it was during her attempt that her boyfriend started to tease her for her smelly feet. She now faces charges of second-degree assault with a deadly weapon. For herrage control Dallas has been selected as Loserr of the Week Loserr Note: Just imagine what would have happened if he mentioned how her butt locked in that outfit!!
Loserr of the Week for August 15th Reported in the Associated Press through WATV-TV Pontotoc Electric Power Association cut off the electricity of a Bruce, Mississippi hair salon in the middle of the day due to a non payment of the electric bill. Unfortunately, the money the owner paid for her bill was mistakenly applied to her home account. This would not be such a big deal except the power was turned off in the middle of the day while an unnamed client was getting her hair colored. Because there was no electricity there was no way to wash off the chemicals off the woman's hair because the salon's electric water heater wasn't working. The results were the woman was left mostly bad on the top of her head. Since most Loserr's have no control over things that happen to them, the unknown woman has been selected as Loserr of the Week. Loserr Note: Even though our Loserr of the Week name has not been revealed, I am sure if you spent a few hours in Bruce, Mississippi this week during humid August temperatures, it is most likely the woman wearing a ski cap!
Loserr of the Week for July 25th Reported in the Associated Press through the Idaho Mountain Express Dax the police dog in Sun Valley, Idaho was suspended for a few weeks for snacking on a small schnauzer named Max. The unprovoked attack cost the city a $600 vet bill along with Dax's suspension. Dax is trained to find drugs and missing people has been selected as the Loserr of the Week for his suspension. Loserr Note: In Dax's defense, those schnauzers are very very annoying!
Loserr of the Week for July 14th Reported in the Associated Press through the Chicago Sun Times Porky Pig was attacked by two off duty employees at the Six Flag Great America Park in Gurnee, Illinois. Well not an actually Pig, but a 24 year old female employee dressed as Porky. Loserr Note: Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaats All Folks!!!!
Loserr of the Week for June 26th Reported in the Associated Press The names are not being given to protect the children, but two mothers in Victorville, CA were arrested on suspicion for being a disruptive presence at a kindergarten graduation ceremony. The school had to be put in lockdown because the incident which started with the two women lead to some other men joining and an all our brawl broke out. For their good effort at being great role models, the mothers have been selected as the Loserrs of the Week! Loserr Note: It seems neither mother had a chance for nap time and the fight was due to their crankiness.
Loserr of the Week for June 8th Reported in the Associated Press You have heard of cat burglers, well Jeremy M. of East Providence, Rhode Island is the cat nap burgler! It seems Jeremy broke into a home but was found sleeping on the hallway floor of the basement by the owners who called the police. Jeremy was arrigned on breaking and entering charges and also selected as the Loserr of the Week. Loserr Note: It was alleged that Jeremy was found with a stolen blanket and pillow.
Loserr of the Week for June 1st Reported in the Associated Press Certain career choices should only be made when you have access to the right equipment. For example, if you are going to become a professional golfer, you need a set of golf clubs to use. The same is true if you decide to get involved in a life of crime that involves the need for quick getaways. You should definitely have a mode of transportation that involves some time of power. Unfortunately Christopher M. of Anchorage, Alaska did not take that into account when he allegedly attempted to rob a bank and getaway on a bicycle. After taking the cash from the teller, he "sped" off on his bicylcle to only be chased down by the police a few blocks away. When the police tried to cut off his getaway ride, he didn't stop, crashed his bike into the car and went sliding over the hood , and eventually arrested. For not preparing ahead, Christopher M. is this week's Loserr of the Week. Loserr Note: Just for the record, in no way was Sarah Palin involved in this case!
Loserr of Most of May Not Reported in the Associated Press or anywhere else Ok, the Loserr had a problem with his laptop and was unable to make updates to the website, so he decided to lay on the beach for a couple weeks and now has a really bad burn to match his red boxers. Then for some reason even after he got back from vacation, he remained lazy and failed to do updates. Becoming a bigger slacker than Rick from Rickless Rants has earned him the Loserr of Most of May
Loserr of the Week for April 25th See, sometimes the little guy does win out! Christopher Shaw, a 29 year old from central Missouri won $258 million in the Powerball jackpot. A father of 3, Chistopher had $28.96 in his bank account prior to winning last week. With his winnings he plays to pay off his mounting bills, pay off the $1,000 he owes on his truck, and replace the two front teeth he is missing. By trade Mr. Shaw (that is what we call millionaires), is a convenience store clerk, though it is not known whether he will be making a career change.
Loserr of the Week for April 18th
Matthew made himself vomit on the two after a companion of his was kicked out for unruly behavior. Four or five fans in the next section rushed over to help and somewhere in the process Clemmens was punched in the face as he tried to break free.
Loserr Note: It was rumored that Matthew learned this technique from women he tried asking out on a date.
Loserr of the Week for April 4th The agent pretending to be that buyer set up a meeting with the suspects and was able to recover 60 bags of heroin in the arrest. For the errant text, the Pine Plains Three are this week's Loserr of the Week. Loserr Note: It was rumored not only were the suspects arrested, but since they didn't have a texting plan they had to pay an extra 25 cents for each message they sent the agent.
Loserr of the Week for March 28th
Loserr of the Week for March 21st
Loserr of the Week for March 6th The skater took all the blame on himself, but when a coach only has one job and doesn't do it, the fault squarely falls on his shoulders. Therefore, the Gold Medal from Loserr.com goes to Gerard Kremkers, along with the title of Loserr of the Week.
Loserr of the Week for February 20th A Texas Christian University student (Amon C.) willingly had his butt branded, suffering second and third degree burns and requiring surgery.
Loserr of the Week for February 13th
We don't know the name, sex or any description of the offender, but in Brooklyn, NY, someone mugged a 10 year old Westie Lexie.
Loserr of the Week for February 6th
A 61 year old woman from Long Island was stopped by the police in the high-occupancy vehicle lane of the Long Island Expressway for a suspicious passanger with sunglasses on during an overcast day. It seems she had a mannequin in the passenger seat fully dressed with a long dark wig, blazer, shirt and scarf.
After being summoned for a possible fine of up to $135 she was also honored as Loserr of the Week for not having any friends.
Loserr of the Week for January 30th
A 59 year old man lumber truck driver crashed his truck into a home in Lowell, Massachusetts when he was knocked unconscious by choking on a small chili from Wendy's. The man reported he remembers hitting a bump in the road and then passed out from choking.
Loserr Note: The Loserr wonders if there is a lawyer somewhere getting a case ready to charge Wendy's with anti-choke lids.
Loserr of the Week for January 23rd Reported in the Associated Press
A 38 year old woman from Warm Springs, Georgia was jailed on charges of animal cruelty, child cruelty and battery for forcing her 12 year old son to kill his pet hamster with a hammer as punishment for bad grades.
Loserr Note: The most baffling part of this story is that the rabbit was the pet responsible for making sure the child was studying his school work.
Loserr of the Week for January 16th Submitted by a Loserr.com fan
Jake P, (last name removed) from Port Jefferson, NY had been waiting for a year for this day. Last year he was picked on by his friends for not dropping down to his boxers on NO PANTS SUBWAY RIDE DAY 2009. Jake felt he was slightly overweight and did not want to show off the flab on his thigh and legs. So he was the only one of a group of 5 friends not to drop his pants and celebrate. Jake worked out 5 days a week to get his body to the point where he could join his friends in this new tradition. Unfortunately Jake in his excitement to show his friends up forgot one important part of the 9th annual NO PANTS SUBWAY RIDE DAY 2010 (Jan 10th). NEVER go Commando on that day!! When Jake dropped his pants, he gave the car full of people an unexpected show. Though most were amused, he was still hit with an indecent exposure fine of $250.
Not only did Jake receive a fine, but he is also this week's select of Loserr of the Week.
Loserr Note: It was also reported that severel people misunderstood the meaning of the day and were causing problems at various SUBWAY restaurants.
Loserr of the Week for January 9th Reported in USA Today
An attempted robbery was reported at the Bank of Western Massachusetts last Thursday by a man wearing dark clothes and sunglasses.
The suspected bank robber told the teller he was armed and wanted cash.
The robbery was thwarted when a quick thinking customer in the bank yelled at the suspect and told him to leave.
The suspect listened and left the bank into his getaway car without any money.
Loserr Note: After reveiwing the tape the FBI profilers believe the suspect is married since he didn't talk back and then shrugged and slumped his shoulders when the female customer yelled at him.
Loserr of the Week for January 2nd Reported in Telegraph.co.uk
Helmut, a hypnotist in training, while practicing in the mirror, put himself into a trance accidently for 5 hours, when he was discovered by his wife looking into the mirror like a zombie.
After several efforts to try and bring him out of the trance herself, she had to call his trainer (another hypnotherapist) who talked him out of it over the phone.
Loserr Note: Since this incident Helmut has been volunteering to make the bed every morning and do all the laundry. His wife refuses to comment on why this might be happening now.
If you have a story to nominate for Loserr of the Week, please send your story to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it with Loserr of the Week on the subject line.
Loserr of the Week for December 25th Reported in the Associated Press
On Friday, December 18th a 53 year old woman from Kerryville, TX called 911 to report that "her husband did not want to eat his supper".
Over a 6 month period she called 30 times for non-emergency reasons, but the call to report her husband would not eat his supper has earned her the Loserr of the Week.
Loserr Note: Though it was not confirmed, rumor was the officers were also unsuccessful getting the husband to eat his meal even when they threatened to send him to bed without dessert.
If you have a story to nominate for Loserr of the Week, please send your story to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it with Loserr of the Week on the subject line.
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| Last Updated on Saturday, 15 January 2011 23:12 |